The Michael Teachings
using your Truth Love Energy to learn how to choose, and to choose how to learn
My daughter
I hope it's not weird that I'm posting this here. My beautiful daughter Rosalie Lightning died suddenly yesterday. She was 3 weeks shy of her 2nd birthday. I guess I'm putting this here because I need to hear from others who have lost, especially children.
Replies to This Discussion
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Permalink Reply by TROY on -
Leela! Oh my god. I am speechless. I am so sorry. I am not even suggesting a comparison, but Spyder died suddenly yesterday, too. I have been a basket case. I cannot even imagine the loss of a child.
Leela, the only thing I can say to this kind of horror is that it is as awful as it is. There's nothing wonderful or higher or metaphysical or spiritual about it. It is just awful. And that has to be ok. I have to be okay with how awful I feel, how haunted I am, and how guilty and angry I am. You have to be okay with whatever comes up for you, too. That's the only way through, and that kind of raw honesty actually does lead you to the higher, more metaphysical, spiritual, or even wonderful things on the other side of this. But for now, it's not anything but awful, confusing, and devastating. Be okay with all of that and let yourself grieve. We may never make sense of any of this kind of stuff while alive, or even after, I don't know, but we have to be okay with that, too.
By the way, "being okay with all of this" means to me that sometimes I'm not okay with any of it at all.
I love you, Leela. I feel so lucky to have met your daughter, and I cherish those few sweet moments all of you made for me at the cafe. I miss you.
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Permalink Reply by Martha on -
Oh my god. I am so sorry. I don't know if it was sudden or not, or if that even matters. I can't even imagine how you must feel. The spiritual aspect may kick in later, or help later, or not, but "all is choice" probably doesn't mean a goddamn thing to you today. Death sucks.
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Permalink Reply by Leela on -
Troy, you are right. Absolutely right. I'm sorry about Spyder, too.
Do you have time to do a session with me sometime soon? I need some direct Michael guidance. Want to email me privately about it or should I book through the site?
I feel sick. I can't stop thinking about the grotesque aspects of it. Or anything else.
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Permalink Reply by Bobby on -
I'm so sorry to hear that his has happened Leela. I can't imagine what you're going through so I don't feel I really have any words that would make you feel any better and wouldn't blame you a bit if you just didn't WANT to feel better at this time. If/when you do feel like talking, we are here for you. HUGS.
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Permalink Reply by TROY on
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Leela, we'll arrange something privately, but we both need time to grieve for a moment. I have to put most things on hold for now, because I can barely function, myself. I will make myself available to you as soon as possible, even if it is spontaneously on a day that just turns out to be a good day in the week ahead. I also know the haunting, grotesque, ghastly parts that are really messing with my mind today. I am right there with you, though I don't know the details, of course. I just know my own and that's enough. We'll get through these things, and when I can, I'll bring Michael in for us.
Leela said:Troy, you are right. Absolutely right. I'm sorry about Spyder, too.
Do you have time to do a session with me sometime soon? I need some direct Michael guidance. Want to email me privately about it or should I book through the site?
I feel sick. I can't stop thinking about the grotesque aspects of it. Or anything else.
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Permalink Reply by Heidi Taylor on -
Oh Leela,
I'm so sorry to hear about your terrible loss. I just can't even imagine what you must
be going through. (((((((sending you love))))))))
Heidi
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Permalink Reply by Elaine on -
Oh No Leela, I don't know what to say. As a Mother this is all our worst ever fear and therefor I can not even IMAGINE what you are going through or how one goes on. and I don't know what to say.......I wish there were some magic words or actions. Please know we are here if you need to vent or talk or babble or cry or anything
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Permalink Reply by Leela on
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Thanks to all of you. Troy, I totally understand and hope that you will take your time. I know how deeply connected you are to all of your animal companions, and how connected they are to you. Sending you a lot of healing and love. We'll talk privately later.
Right now I just feel sick and lost. I am terrified of what happens when the shock wears off.
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Permalink Reply by Barbara Taylor on -
Leela,
First let me offer my sincere condolences on the loss of your daughter. I have not lost a child in this lifetime myself and cannot imagine the heartache that brings.
I have lost other family members of course, and there is often no way to "explain" the unexplainable. With that, I will say that Michael has given some "reasons" why people might have a short life. Sometimes, they need to finish up some aspect of a previous life and therefore, only come to do that. Sometimes, there is a karmic balance that needs to happen so they only come long enough to do that. Sometimes, they agree to fulfill some need of the parents and only come for that. Sometimes, there is a new karma created.
There are many other possible "reasons" and none of that matters when the pain is so great and the shock is so great from the death of a beautiful little child.
The most important thing right now is for you to allow yourself to remember the love you shared and to know that she is OK and happy where she is. She is alive on another realm and she is whole and so very loved where she is - much more than our little physical selves here can imagine. We've all been there and have vague memories of that.
No matter what happened or "why" it happened, it is what you have to deal with now. PLEASE do not feel guilty or go through "if only...." as that will only waste the precious energy you have that will be needed to heal yourself from the shock and grief.
There is no timetable for dealing with grief. It will come and go, and come back again. The main thing you can do for yourself is to feel the love that is all around you, holding you and supporting you. Whether that is physical love in friends and family members, or via other methods, only you know what works for you and how to take care of yourself.
There are lots of good resources for dealing with grief on the Internet and probably in your community. Grief support groups are often offered by churches or counselors, so if that is of interest, you might explore when you feel ready. There may be counselors here who would be willing to help if that is of interest to you.
Allow your grief and your feelings to flow however long they do. There is no "rule" that says you have to deal with it in any particular way or any particular time. It's all a very, very personal journey that only you can take in your own way.
My heart and prayers go out to you and your daughter.
Barbara
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Permalink Reply by Diane HB on -
Oh my god. I'm so sorry about your daughter, Leela. My condolences to you and your family. I'll send some Reiki your way if you're willing.
And Troy, I'm sorry to hear about Spyder, too. This sucks.
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